insulinoma

insulinoma

no..nothing to do with biology.
but a couple days ago, our family found out that that our dog had insulinoma. She has a minimum of 4 months without surgery and a maximum of 18months with surgery.
honestly, yes, she's a dog. But she's also a 7th member of our family. cliche and cheesy yes maybe.
tess may be ugly, with her long nose and big butt....but she was to me like that teddy bear every little kid has. I often find her sleeping on my bed, her head on the pillows as if she was human, and when i tried to push her over, she'd just look at me as if i was crazy, as if i was intruding on her space. But whenever i looked sad, or whenever something was wrong, she knew. She would come and sit at my feet, without me calling her, without anything, she'd just come. And she'd put her paw on my lap and keep pushing me with her nose until i acknowledged her. If i stopped petting her and starting crying, she would paw me more and more as if she wanted me to hug her. She hated snuggling, but she would if she knew you wanted to. She put up with so much from us. I know she's not gone yet, but the fact that there's a tumor in her pancreas, and the fact that is malignant means that one day soon she will.
She was so human to me, and although she wasn't I don't know how i'm going to cope with her leaving. I always thought we'd have her forever and ever, well not literally, but i never thought about her dying. She's only 8! Seriously....i don't know how i'm going to get by without her. She's part of the family. The only one though who wouldn't fight with me.
i love you so much.